toughen up little soldier

the veins and pancreas of pop-culture


a mayan contradiction

It's just about time to wrap up 2011. A year that offered me great promises.. gave me love, freedom, sorrow, happiness and wisdom. 2012, aside from world apocolypse, promises to be even better and busier. I've mentioned my live-better plans but here is the black and white list of promises I am making to myself for the year to come. My New Year's Resolutions. Some are specific but some are simply ideas that I know following will continue to guide me along the path to happiness.

1. The top of everyone's list.. Get in Shape by March vacation!
2. Keep up with the gym 4-5 times/week.
3. Start my BFA
4. Eat Healthier
5. Socialize More! (Yes, by that I mean get fucked up whenever possible)
6. Go Skiing
7. Read more Books
8. Watch less Internet Tv...
9. Save MOnies and get a part time job
10. Send more Letters <3
11. Lay on the Beach more.
12. Climb more Mountains!
13. Turn 19 (I want this cake please)
14. Dance.

What are your 2012 resolutions?:)


holiday stuffed shrooms

It's time for a recipe. I won't bore you with the list of awesome things santa brought me like Palahniuk's Damned, Hunter Wellie winter insoles and a princess piggy bank. (All this for being nothing but naughty all year long ;) ) I'll get right the point.. of Lori's Healthy Holiday Stuffed Mushrooms!
You'll Need:
Green/Red peppers (cause christmas colors hehe)
1/2 onion (wear your shades while choppin)
lil bit of OLIVE oil
lil bit of butta
garlic salt (if you like garlic)
Tomatoes (optional)
Lots of Big Mushrooms
(Sorry about the lack of measurements.. numbers are not my friends.)
Chop up your peppers, onions, tomats and the stems from the mushrooms. Fry it up in a pan with the olive oil and butter until it soaks up the oil but not until its soggy. Stuff the mix into the shroom tops with a small spoon. Sprinkle with cheese and bake for 10 minutes then broil for 5! Happy Holidays :)


health freak

After admitting that the freshman 15 is not a myth and that I have become a victim to its terrifying effects I decided to take some action. About a month ago I worked up the courage to do something I've always wanted to and joined a gym. God knows I'm pretty lazy so this is a big deal for me!!
The YMCA in Fredericton is a beautiful new building with brand new machines with built in TVs. There's nothing like a five mile run while watching What Not to Wear! My membership also includes loads of weekly classes like yoga, spinning and zumba; the use of a pool; squash and karate lessons.For only 37/month its the best decision I've made for myself! 
Going to the gym is a big step and feels great. But a lifestyle change is more about working out. I truly believe that being healthy is about making small decisions every day. Switching to skim milk and whole wheat bread came first for me. Walking instead of driving, water (LOTS OF WATER) instead of pop, an apple instead of a kit kat..Through the Holidays its not always easy but I BELIEVE IN YOUUU! (Check out the blog that I'm not ashamed to say I read daily and has inspired me beyond words in the past few months! )

Be Healthy, Be Beautiful, Be Happy and Happy Holidays <3


dormitory fouroneone

3 weeks from now, I will be moving from my cozy apartment to a dorm room for the first time in my life. I'm a pretty big comfort freak and it's really important that the space I live in reflects my personality and gives off a sense of airy calm. I love art, color, pillows and an organized mess. As for my future 6x8 cell, there may be some challenges in achieving a cozy space that doesn't feel cluttered and claustrophobic by my large quantities of books, clothing and posters.

I've been looking through interior design photos to get some ideas on how to pull my room together to create a centered and livable environment. Here's a few suggestions!

1. A central reoccurring color scheme. (Like an outfit, room accessories should 'go' together. I plan on opting for different shades of blue and green.)

2. Keep things Off the Floor (To keep a light and uncluttered atmosphere which will help you concentrate when it comes to that all nighter essay and will make your room feel bigger)

3. Hang tha Clothins (Weather exposed or in closet, if you can see all your clothing it saves a lot of time in the morning and you're more likely to dress cuter everyday instead of the same old Tommies sweater and jeans uniform!)

4. Have Fun with Lighting (Most dorms have teeny windows that don't let a lot of light in which can make your space feel even more like a prison cell.. so find something funky and within your color scheme. I chose some hanging chinese lamps from

5. Fabricz (Don't clutter the wall with friend picz.. that's what fb is for)

6. Plantz (A real plant will bring life to your room and naturally cleanse your air. Also, if you miss your pet from home it will give you something to take care of !) 

Enjoy decorating your room.. I will post pictures of my own turnout in the new year :)


pretty horror story

I watch a lot of online television.. Less of this vice will definitely be on my list of new year's resolutions. But for now, I'll indulge. My recent favorite is the new drama called American Horror Story. Based loosely around the classic Amityville Horror story and woven seamlessly and seductively with every other scary plot line you can thing of. Opening with an eery dubstep tune to scary images (I can't watch the opening by myself!) and set in a beautiful 1908 LA mansion and populated with a rebellious teen, grieving mother, adulterous husband, ginger twins with slit throats, mutilated infants, dead maids..cheerleaders.. and the best part is you have no idea who is dead and who isn't. :)

Yesterday's post made me think about albums that I can listen to from start to finish without skipping a song. When I'm driving my favorite thing is to belt out to some good ol rock and roll.. Or new rock. The Pretty Reckless is Taylor Momsen's (GG) band that you can judge all you want.. but it's so good. You can sing along, rock out, get pumped up and cry your eyes out (Just Tonight, Nothing Left to Lose). :)


damn girl where have I been jesus?

It's been a veryvery long time. Here's the jizz of my last few months since graduation (hehe). I spent 2 months in England.. check out da blogz: Now I am studying some silly courses at a University called St Thomas in Fredericton, NB and teaching an art class to lil kiddies at Madrigal Music and Art Studio. I'm still on the road to the Canadian dream and bois, it's a long road. Luckily I have the outside world to lighten the dark days of my present existence. 
Oh God, What Else? I suppose a quick note about the tunes that got me through this summer, a breakup, my travels and my daily 20 min commute to school. It's my good old pals of Mumford and Sons and their album Sigh No More including of course Hold on to What You Believe. It's a special thing when you come across an album that every single song speaks to you and how you feel. Boo hoo eh?
Beside what this post would have you believe.. I am slowly becoming a much happier person. But we all have our days.


skins in america

It's about how excited I am about the whole first season of Skins US. Yah, the UK original is dece but I love the forced drama and overacting and exagerated characters that only good old america can provide! It's this artistically shot drama about these street smart kids getting into urban trouble.. basically a vamped up, sexed up and Rock and Roll version of the classic Degrassi. From the very first over-extended opening scene of Tony's (omg fuck me) morning routine scene to the iconic shot of Cadie, in a red dress, haggered from a night of binging pills, standing at water's edge, watching as her friends emerge from the water after driving a stolen van full of weed into the river. It's just really sick.


Island of Venus

It's time for lesson in Art and Literature.. from yours truly! :)

I've always been a devourer of literature.. from the British romantic comedies to the unorganized Rockstar biographies to the modern classics. I want to tell you about two books that I am currently interested in. What captivated me most about them was not the content of their words (although both were written in unique and sophisticated prose) but what attracted me to them in the first place. The cover art.

People often comment and go on about the art on musical albums, as I have in the past, in this blog at times (still love vampire weekend's contra which hangs with pride in my bedroom) but often overlook the wonderful art that can be found on the outside of books!

The Birth of Venus

Like it's tagline, Art, Sex and Florentine Hysteria.. This novel is about a young girl during the renaissance, the most powerful time in the history of art, trying to find the freedom in life that all artists yearn for. The cover shows Alessandra dressed in gossamer fabric, a look of melancholy. Like Venus herself, she seems to know things about love and sex that those of us alive for decades could never understand.

The famous painting by Botticelli has become one of my favorite pieces of art.. a survivor of the dark days of Florence.. hidden away for years and suddenly emerging as a ray of light and rebirth among the admirers of art and beauty everywhere. I love this painting because (The fact that everything about the painting's composition is perfect goes without saying) of what it represents for in the world of art and of the idea of immediate immaculateness.. love at first sight. 

The second book is the one I am reading right now and the inspiration for this post.
Island Beneath the Sea

This novel was originally written in Spanish and translated recently for the english folk. So far, it's about a prostitute, some military men and many, many,opressed young females. I have a type.

I enjoy the cover of this book for many reasons. The painting that graces it is by Ana Juan, a talented illustrator. I was drawn to this cover first by the sadness in the young girl's eyes and secondly by the exotic and soft skin tone. Thirdly, I was drawn to this novel by the subtle display of the North American-tabooed taboo of nipples by design. The female nipple fascinates me a little more than I'm willing to admit.. mostly because of the fact that it is so tragically forbidden. 


were all gonna die but sal paradise

It's been so long since I;ve blogged.. been cheating on you with my new website but it's for bussiness so you understand. Secondly, not much has caught my interest lately. UNTIL YESTERDAY. Yes, I am super smart and therefore have the luxery to spend way too much time at school surfing the web. Guess what I found...

The release date for One the Road! I'm not a hundred percent positive of it's authenticity but I traced the source back to an early predictions oscar nomination site. Apparently the date is October 25, 2011. Yay! Also, found these pictures.

hey there mary-lou
based on the novel by Jack Kerouac

Oh, the perpetual and senseless search for It.

"They danced down the streets like dingledodies, and I shambled after as I've been doing all my life after people who interest me, because the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn..."
words to live by

Why am I excited about this right now? Am I not about to embark on the greatest adventure of my life; Life?


hipsters heart it

Okay, okay. Im a hipster. Fuck. Now I just need one of those stupid hats that look like theyre made out of a stretchy sock to perch on the back of my head...... hey if its good enough for johnnny depp.

Last night I stumbled upon (not on stumbleupon) a pretty cool website thats kinda like a mix between and twitt. It's just a bunch of catagorized pictures all in the same style pretty much.. that cross proccessed slightly sepiaed vintagy beach feel.. You know!? Anyway, I'm not making much sense but just go ahead and check it out for youself. Or check out the box in the sidebar for Heart It, where all my fave pictures from the site will end up. S'all for now. Lates.


Nudo Bruno

I would like to introduce you to my new favorite fashion photographer. His work can be described as many things.. whimsical, surrealistic, pornographic. and always interesting.

Bruno Dayan's subjects are mostly idealistic woman (usually topless.. or bottomless) in seductive poses of pleasure with their heads thrown back in ecstacy . They should be rude but they are somehow beautiful.. and it's just so hard to look away from them.

don't forget to visit his website if you dig him:)


ugly duckling lake

My Golden Globe movie spree started today with black swan and the social network. I lay here now, feeling like an overly mentally stable networking consumer, and dats alright man. Although I was bothered by a few things like the glamour and believability, the blend of humor, intelligence, casting, sequential technique and style in the social network make it an obvious win. Here's my personal criticism of it's losing opponent.. just gonna kick it while its down loool.

The parallel between the plot of the original Swan Lake ballet and the film Black Swan (based on the novel of the same name) is far too evident from the opening scene when we are are thrown into the midst of the  fucked up ballerina's nightmare where she is being haunted by Rotbart. She's mentally ill, constantly scratching her skin, throwing up and causing all sorts of self destruction embodying a girl capable of the virginal innocence of the white swan as well as the dark impulsions of the Black Swan (real subtle hereee). Despite the less than perfect special effects and the overuse of Tchaikovsky's original score as overpowering background music the thing about this film that really got to me was the way it sold out in multiple artistic areas in order to apeal to a wider audience.

Let me explain..In MY opinion, Natalie Portman was great and beautiful, nor can I say anything bad about the lovely fresh faced Mila Kunis (and I can't say my boyfriend.. or myself.. didn't enjoy the girl on girl scene hott..(even if it did turn out te exist only within the tormented mind of the mentally ill ballerina wtffff)) BUT I can't help but feel that Kunis' character... "Lily" was completely irrelevant and unnecessary.. and was written in simply for public appeal and under the sex sells motto-been-made-mantra by hollywood producers. We could just as easily have witnessed Nina's slip into insanity and inner battle with her evil side without the confusion of the third-wheel character. I actually think it would have been even more powerful and artistic to have witnessed Nina's struggle without the distraction of the quirky (supposedly antagonistic) character.  But try selling a movie with a Man vs Self plotline.. ... Oh I almost forgot to mention the technique that i absolutly hate.. use of wardrobe to imply things.. Nina is seen wearing light colors while Lily wears a darker pallet.. ugh. lazy way of establishing stuff.. might as well be raining every time she's sad.

That being said, had the role of Lily been played by someone else... someone less comedic(the touches of humor clashed horribly with the whimsical psychological thrill and overall beautiful monotony of the film.. unless your name is Shakespeare don't think you know how to successfully incorperate comedic relief into a serious story without looking cheesy or sacrificing a constant tone) or someone who looks less like the drugged up version of Miley with too much eyeliner.. maybe the integrity and artistic merit of this film could have been salvaged.


call me antoinette

This weekend I was looking forward to a Friday evening of solo movie enjoyment followed by subsequent release of inspiration onto canvas. Unfortunately Black Swan was storm delayed and I am forced to look for inspiration elsewhere(which reminds me, Somewhere didn't come either, sad face). But I needn't look far! Nylon Magazine is always there for me in these troubling times.

The bestest fashion magazine in my opinion because it gives the artist's way of looking at things. Here's just a few of my favorite cross processed shots, not to mention the awesome article titles.

and finally a segway video!

14 months has slowly dwindled itself down to a mere 6 months. Untill my adventure to Europe that is. Paris, of course, is my main destination. I don't even care that it's such a cliché for a girl like me, I mean, just look at the romantic summery nostalgia of that video. It nearly brings me to tears. 

Coming Soon!:
These things are all inspiration for my upcoming first attempt at an outdoor art installation/performance art piece. Yah, it may be a tee bit beyond my skill level as an artist but it'll never happen unless I create it. (Thanks in advance to my model and photographer girls:) 

Ohhhh, PS... visit this blog it's sick.


smartest man alive.

this is devendra banhart.. you can call him a hippie, call him a phony, call him pretentious... and youd probably be right. but he's ever so lovable and off-beat.... id off-beat him so hard... oops did i type that out loud?